The Oaxaca Project

by Jennifer Ludders

In addition to providing emotional support for the kids, Deborah works closely with the children’s parents, who also crave support and can benefit greatly from EFT. Usually they are far away from home, their other children and their normal supporting network and, although they are suffering, they are usually determined to stay “strong” for their child. Being strong to them often means showing no sign of sadness or emotional vulnerability. However, energetically no doubt the children can sense when their parents are holding back feelings as opposed to when they are feeling open and positive. This has a huge effect on the child’s state of wellbeing and health.

I became quite friendly with Maria, the mother of one of the babies with Leukemia, Yamilet. One day Maria seemed particularly sad so I sat and comforted her for a while. She didn’t want to tap but just seemed to want to talk and be comforted. After a while she started asking me about the U.S., telling me that she had lived in Los Angeles for two years. She had made the dangerous illegal crossing through the desert with a “coyote” (people trafficker) for eight days and crossed the border near Nogales, Arizona, as part of a group of 30 people, ten of whom were women.

Once in California she moved around, working in agriculture and on a meat processing plant. She said the work was hard but similar to her village near the coast in Oaxaca. After two years, she had to leave California because her mother in Oaxaca was sick and she didn’t know how long she would live. The second time Maria tried to make the illegal crossing across the desert she wasn’t so lucky – she got picked up by “miga” (immigration) and sent back to Mexico.

Maria had had many hardships in her life, but she said nothing came even close to having a daughter with cancer. She said it was ironic because her other daughter was born very thin and weak but ultimately turned out to be quite healthy. By contrast, Yamilet was extremely healthy when she was born and began walking very early on. However one day she fell; her feet swelled up the size of grapefruits, she became very pale and couldn’t seem to recover. Maria began taking her to many different doctors and hospitals in her village and eventually the capital, but no one could figure out what was wrong. It was only after searching for more than a month that she came to the Hospital General and was told that Yamilet had Leukemia.

Now Yamilet, who usually sits very quietly, was looking around with her big brown eyes. She has had three chemo treatments and only has small patches of hair on her head. Maria sleeps in the chair next to her every night waiting for the news that Yamilet’s condition is good enough to take her home now.

She asked me if it was possible for Yamilet to be cured of her condition, looking at me as if I might hold some ultimate truth in my hands. This was the second time I’d been asked that question in less than a week. I emphasized to Maria that I am not a medical doctor. Then I told her – based on what I’d heard Deborah tell another parent with the same question – that recovery is always possible and the chances are greatest if Yamelit keeps her immunity high. This is why green vegetable drinks and very little sugar are recommended, as this gives her body more strength to heal itself.

I told her that it is also particularly helpful for Maria and her family to maintain good self care, allowing themselves to feel their emotions as they arise (something tapping can greatly help with) so that she can stay emotionally balanced and provide a sense of grounding and presence for Yamilet. She asked more about the drinks and said she wanted to tap next time I came. The next day we tapped on how sad she felt, missing all of her children so far away and afraid that Yamilet might not live through this. She told me afterwards she felt a sense of peace and calm that she hadn’t felt since before Yamilet had got sick.

Yamilet